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sushigal007 · 2 years ago

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Whoops, it’s been a while, hasn’t it? I blame the covid. Totally wiped me out. It’s also been a busy few weeks at work, plus my kid got themselves a theme park pass, and half my free time is now spent driving to Thorpe Park. And, my sister has been to Greece about four times this year already ‘cause our mum’s been unwell, and that’s me on airport driving duty. Basically, too much real life, not enough simulated life. But! I’m ill again, which means I’ve finally managed to claw a few hours spare to post the Ramirez household. Say hi to Checo, everyone!

Right, time to drug your army of children.

Checo and Lisa: Actually, we would like to bang.

And I would like you to train your quads. Lisa: Isn’t that what the nanny’s for?

Huh, apparently so!

But we can also add in a little parentification now that Tessa’s ageing up.

Tessa: These hands were made for jazz.

Yep, Tessa’s LTW is to become Lord of the Dance. We’ll see how that goes.

Max also grew up! Nobody noticed.

So yeah, this is Tessa’s life now. Tessa: It’s not quite the dance party I was expecting.

Still, there are sweet moments along the way. Erica: Huggles? Alyson: Huggles!

Terence: Huggles? Jacob: DOG FOOD ATTACK RARRRRGH.

Terence: D:

Tessa: Lock my door.

Lisa: I AM NOT- Having a good time? Lisa: GET SOME NEW MATERIAL. Lisa: AND USE IT TO ENTERTAIN ME.

All right, here’s something funny. Lisa: The... nanny? Keep watching.

Nanny: I was so busy potty training the children, I forgot to potty train myself! Lisa: It’s mean, but OK, it’s a little funny. (That’s not all nanny piss btw, I’m just very bad at catching Max in the act.)

Speaking of piss.

Jacob: There there, good potty.

Checo: He can pee in a pot, he’s my favourite now.

Jacob: High chair. Checo: You’re so right!

Lisa, alas, is not enjoying toddlers quite as much. Lisa: I’m too pretty for this.

Erica: RELEASEEEEEE MEEEEEEE!

Terence: Laid a fresh one for you, mom.

Lisa: This is fine.

Tessa: OK, you put your left leg in, your left leg out. In, out, in, out, and shake it all about.

Terence: Sis, hey, sis, hey. Erica: Hush please, I am concentrating.

Terence: That’s right, hand it over. Erica: Oh. I see how it is.

Bath time for stinky boys.

A problem for future Sushi.

At last, the toddler stage is over! Tessa: Do you wanna go first or...? Checo: Oh yeah, sure, no problem.

Checo: But first, let me ogle my wife. Tessa: Soon I will be at university and all of this will be behind me...

First up, Erica! Erica: Yay!

Then Alyson! Checo: Hooray for me! Alyson: Hooray for cake.

Tessa ad Sharla: Happy birthday to the wall!

Next up is Jacob, assuming I haven’t got the names mixed up.

Kennedy: Toot toot.

Jacob: Limbo!

Lisa: Whew, right in the nick of time. Lisa: So long as we ignore the bit where time kept going looping for three hours so I could finish this.

But yes, finally it’s Terence’s turn to grow up.

Benjamin: I’m gonna punch him. Please don’t. Benjamin: Gonna punch him so hard.

Celebrate good times, come on!

Erica: Wait a minute...

Erica: I hate that stupid bear outfit. Alyson: I think he’s hibernating!

Jacob: Does he have to do it at the bottom of the stairs though?

Erica lives at the piano now. Her OTH is Sports.

Tessa: Something about emergencies, I guess.

Lisa: Finally, I can start working on the damn car.

Good Lord.

Let’s have a little playtime interlude.

Mailman: Bills. Erica: Do you accept lemonade? Mailman: Not in exchange for bills. Erica: How about in exchange for money? Mailman: Technically, that is also bills.

Fuck that librarian.

Lisa: Whatever. I’m taking a nap.

Um.

Checo: Hot wife! Freezing cold wife, actually. Wanna do something about that? Checo: Nope!

Why? He hasn’t done anything. Alyson: Yet.

Tessa: Ahhh, dance time!

Chess party.

Gaming party.

Just lots of cute family bonding moments.

Checo: I’m too sexy for my shirt.

Bath time for stinky boys. Which I know I said last time too, but I just really like this pet bath.

Werewolf: Is she OK? No.

Lisa: Zzzz... piss... Checo: On it.

Yeah she might actually die.

Gilbert: Yeah good luck with that.

Lisa: Ugh, what happened? You lost your job and passed out in the absolute worst place possible.

Lisa: I’m freezing! Don’t worry, you’re about to warm yourself up.

Lisa: Eek nooo!

Wanda: HAHAHAHAHA! Lisa: This is because I laughed at the nanny, isn’t it? Yeah, that probably didn’t help.

Anyway, over to Tessa. Tessa: Look, somebody else is pissing themselves! Buck:

Tessa: BAM! In the face!

Decided to check out the furniture store and once again, it is borked. Cashier: It’s Kevin’s fault. Other cashier: Yeah, definitely Kevin.

But you know what? I don’t know how to stop it from happening again, nobody’s got a business LTW anyway, so bye bye business!

Checo: And now to spend the profits.

Lisa: Mmm, that piss puddle really sets the mood. ...There is way too much piss in this update.

If you two make more quads, I will genuinely kill you.

Newspaper kid: Shake? Tessa: Salute.

Tessa: Love love peace peace?

Cute little family dance party. Terence: Except me. Except you.

Jacob: I wanna join in! Go right ahead, sweetie.

Alyson: Are you OK? Terence: Clearly not.

Erica: You might be watching me, but who do you think is watching you? Please don’t, I’m too ill for dep thinking.

Cute!

Please don’t die. Lisa: Frostbite couldn’t do it, and electrocution ain’t gonna do it either.

Weekend! I sent Tessa out to do some singing...

...And then decided to start working on those dance contests for her LTW.

Alas, her first attempt was a failure.

Still, at least she doesn’t take it as badly as this poor townie. Townie: I JUST WANNA DANCE LIKE NO-ONE’S WATCHING! Everyone’s watching. Everyone.

Erica: I’m dying. Alyson: You’re wearing a vest and shorts outside in winter, of course you’re dying.

Alyson: But now, a message about recycling.

Ah how sweet, doomed townie love.

Tessa: Hey, don’t mind me, just gonna practise my moves.

Wait a minute, that looks familiar...

I mean, without the shotgun, but yeah!

And the week ends with Alyson doing a little stargazing. Next up is a single sim household, so hopefully it won’t take me three months to write up. Hopefully!

Uberhood Index

#sims 2 #premades #Uberhood #ramirez

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chopperpirate · 1 year ago

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While Chopper and Carrot were awkwardly glancing left and right, feeling nervous about potentially ruining the moment, Kouka continued. "I'm so proud of you. Your family has grown larger than I could've dreamed. The family in this town is just as precious as your brother and father. Looking down at it from above, I can tell that leaving with your father was the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Suddenly, Kagura's mother began to glow. In an instant, she exploded in a brilliant flash of yellow light, leaving a thousand carrots in her place as the spirit from earlier emerged and flew away. "That is the limit of my power. I'm sorry. To grant both your wishes meant exhausting me to such an extent. I must return to hibernation to recover." The spirit flew away, but the implication was clear. If the magic wasn't used to conjure 1000 carrots, Kagura could've had more time with her mother.

"Hooray!" Carrot cheered as she began happily gobbling up her carrots. The employee Amanto hung his head in defeat at the lack of his wish being granted.

"I wish... uh... can I save mine for later? I really don't know if I should make a wish now-" Chopper was interrupted by the sudden disappearance of the spirit. In its place was a familiar looking woman, one who looked like a taller, older version of Kagura.

"I chose my own fate, to die with my beloved husband and children rather than to live another century alone." Kouka began to say with a soft smile, embracing her child as Chopper and Carrot stared at the display in stunned silence. "I'm so proud of you for getting back the family I devoted myself to. I've always been with you, Kamui, and my beloved Kankou." With her eyes closed, the woman stroked her daughter's head to soothe her.

"I want a gun with infinite bullets." It seemed the employee expected to be a recipient of the wishes as well.

#oretachi wa family #lostusagis

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endlessnightmultiverse · 5 years ago

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Aaaand You won’t believe this, but we are kind of alive (although we might hibernated a bit with a salty taste of the deadlines and in real problems). But, yes, we kind of came to life and also have a few news! For first, now here are the three of us! We have a new member of our little team, it is Mommy's Noodraw. They did the coloring on the last page! Secondly, we are doing a little spin-off for EN, there will be shown the events of Dream’s little foray. Originally, it was supposed to be an animation, but we evaluated our strength and decided to change the format. Most likely it will be black and white comic with more simple style, but there will be shown more, then it was planed for animation. One last time hooray to the new member! vwv

#endless night other info #0w0

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kannra21 · 4 years ago

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If some anime onlys want to spoil the 5th season for themselves then this is your Pandora box, enjoy!

So the last episode of season 4 is manga chapter 190. Endeavor won the fight although he's heavily bleeding so Hawks comes to his aid and teases him for using the same pose as All Might but then, surprise; Dabi is arriving on the scene. The thing is, Dabi sent the nomu to fight Endeavor so that he could finish him off when Endeavor's at his most vulnerable state. Hawks also couldn't fight since Endeavor burned most of his feathers. Miruko comes to the rescue in the last minute and Dabi said "welp fuck that" so he disappeared. Later in the day, Hawks and Dabi meet in the abandoned factory. Hawks is angry bc Dabi acted out of their plan- Dabi was supposed to send the nomu to a different location, not in the middle of the city. He also noted that the nomu was on a completely different level from the ones they've seen so far. Hawks is working for the league and he was supposed to bring some random strong guy to fight the nomu in order to test its abilities, but he chose Endeavor who got damaged pretty badly and is now recovering in the hospital. In reality, Hawks is spying on the league bc the hero commission told him so. Dabi is still suspicious of Hawks, he doesn't trust him but he told him that they'll stay in contact. Later Hawks is arriving to the hospital to check on Endeavor, he's smiling but his eyes are smudged on the corners, meaning that he was crying because he felt guilty for indirectly hurting Endeavor. Later on we find out about Hawks' past. As a little kid he saved some random people from a car crash. From a very young age he was super fast and that's how the hero commission heard of him and wanted to meet him. Hawks' family is very poor and the commission decided to take him under their wing, they also promised to take care of his family. Since then Hawks became a child soldier, he was groomed into becoming a perfect hero. But he feels trapped, like a bird in a cage. He doesn't feel free at all but as long as he can accomplish his dream- to achieve a society where heroes can enjoy their free time, then he'd be happy, even if it meant that he had to dirty his hands in the process.

The next day Endeavor arrives home. Natsuo, Fuyumi and Shouto are having their first family dinner. Endeavor has a permanent scar on his face, the same side Shouto has his burn mark. Shouto is very indifferent towards this and continues slurping his noodles. Natsuo is angry at Endeavor bc he and Shouto finally got to learn more about each other since they couldn't interact much bc Endeavor isolated Shouto from his siblings. He's yelling at him and getting out of the house. Endeavor is taking it all, he knows he deserves it. Fuyumi is sad and wishes for their family to get better. Fuyumi is trying very hard for their family and to remain as optimistic as she possibly can.

Deku's dreaming of ofa users from the end of season 4. We get All Might flashback where Nana's dying and transferring ofa to All Might. Gran Torino is training him afterwards and the two are talking about All Might's lack of experience. All Might goes to America after he graduates. And the flashback ends. Deku talks to All Might about his strange dream of ofa users and All Might is concerned in the beginning but reassures him and tells him that they'll figure it out together. Since Bakugou already knows about ofa Deku and him are training together. Aizawa and Shinsou are coming out of the break room and Aizawa held a meeting at Ground Gamma (training faculty). There're class a and class b at the gathering and they're having joined training in a way that they're being divided into groups. Shinsou is invited bc he's hoping to transfer to the hero course and everyone is surprised. Shinsou declares that he's not wishing to make any friends but you can see Midoriya's determined "I'll befriend you" look. Monoma also wants to befriend Shinsou bc he feels like he can relate to their Quirks both being perceived as villainous. The joint training begins and long story short- Deku gets a new Quirk called Black Whip but he can't control it well so there's chaos on the field but Shinsou and Uraraka manage to save him. Bakugou gets character development bc he saved Jirou from getting attacked by the opponent's team. Afterwards the teachers are evaluating each group's teamwork, class a wins. After that Aizawa tells everyone that Shinsou will definitely transfer to the hero course when they all become 2nd years. It's still unknown if he'll transfer to the class a or b. Aizawa talks to Monoma and asks him if he could pay a visit to Eri tomorrow. Eri meets Monoma for the first time and she's kinda scared but Mirio is joking ab it, calling Monoma "the dark side of ua". Monoma is totally unswept and being fabulous as always. So they enter the house and Aizawa tells him to try to copy Eri's Quirk. A small horn appears on Monoma's head and he's pretty but he says that he can't copy her entire ability since he only copies the bare-bones essence of a Quirk. That's also the reason why he couldn't copy Deku's ofa, only green lightnings that casually appear around his body. Deku is internally glad for Monoma bc he's sure, if Monoma ever managed to copy ofa, that he'd have a bunch of broken bones and we can see Deku sweat-dropping on the thought of it. Aizawa says it's a shame that Monoma couldn't manage to copy her Quirk bc he thought that Monoma could teach her how to use it but since it's not possible they need to find another way. Eri feels like a burden but Deku comforts her and she's smiling again.

It's early December and snow is starting to fall. Class a is excited in the dormitories and Tsuyu is going into hibernation when she feels too cold. We find out that Sero and Todoroki share the same taste in manga. Yes the boys are reading mangas. Bakugou and Todoroki still need to finish their license course so we see the two together with Inasa and Camie again. Gang Orca's having enough of them (he loves them). Class a is commenting on Todoroki and Bakugou while they're away and Kaminari says that getting his license was the only time he ever beat the two at anything. He adds "how sad" and wow such a roast king. Long story short Todoroki and Bakugou accomplished their task- they fought together against some small gang belonging to a criminal organization called meta liberation army and YEA HORIKOSHI IS INTRODUCING US NEW VILLAINS HOORAY. All Might approaches the two after they got their licenses and he's congratulating them by ruffling their heads. Bakugou is disgusted and Todoroki's having a soft smile.

BACK TO THE VILLAINS! The title changes from MY HERO ACADEMIA to MY VILLAIN ACADEMIA, so yea this part is only about the villains. Shigaraki's hair grew longer, he's missing Kurogiri, they're broke bc Giran's away and Dabi's arriving with no newbies since he burns everyone he meets on his way so his search doesn't make that much sense. They need to find the doctor afo often interacted with when all of a sudden, boom, a monstrous-like creature appears out from the ground called Gigantomachia and Shigaraki needs to prove his worth as afo's successor. The league appears in the doctor's underground lab and the doc is supposed to prepare Shigaraki for the future challenges. Shigaraki asks doctor to reproduce his Quirk erasing bullets and the doc asks Shigaraki about his motivations for becoming the world's symbol of destruction. Shigaraki's having flashbacks of his and afo's time together. We get a glimpse of Shigaraki's past and we found out, when his Quirk manifested for the first time, that he accidentally killed his entire family one night and the hands he's having on his body are actually his family's hands. He's living with guilt for the rest of his life. He ended up on the streets and he was asking random civilians for help but everyone ignored him. Afo found him and that's how he ended up becoming the successor of the world's greatest villain. Shigaraki hates afo bc he's an evil prick, but he also hates the entire hero society bc everyone let him down when he needed them the most.

Shigaraki had a good heart as a kid, his own sister compared him to All Might. His grandma is Nana Shimura and he also loved heroes very much. He was basically Deku turned evil. Nonetheless, Shigaraki still has a good heart bc he cares ab his friends. Because of his never-ending hate for the hero society and everything that breathes, he decided to destroy the world and doctor was like "ok u passed the vibe check". The league gets out of the lab and for a month and a half Shigaraki doesn't sleep and fights Gigantomachia. Since Gigantomachia's primary target is his master's successor, the rest of the league is taking shifts and trying to help Shigaraki out. Shigaraki thinks he's close to beating the giant but then Twice's phone rang and it turns the new villain organization kidnapped Giran and held him hostage in their hideout in a mountainous area called Deika City. The league is having enough of their bullshit so they decide to go save their man. Long story short, meta liberation army (mla) is a large, powerful villain organization that follows the philosophy that the free usage of Quirks is a basic human right and emphasizes liberation over regulation. The original meta liberation army was founded and led by the infamous Destro and the current army was founded and led by his son Re-Destro, Rikiya Yotsubashi. Long story short, Toga fights against a pretty lady with a landmine Quirk and she kills the lady, her name was Chitose Kizuki, also known as Curious. Toga's Quirk evolves bc she can now copy Quirks alongside appearances. Dabi is fighting a boy with an ice Quirk, his name is Geten. He has a striking resemblance to Rei Todoroki since he has a shoulder-length white hair and long white lashes. Dabi's fight with Geten was the first time he started using his Quirk more earnestly and the city is basically in ice and fire. Geten has very similar beliefs to Endeavor and thinks that people with strongest Quirks deserve the best things in life and Dabi becomes angry. Tbh this is the first time Dabi drops his mask of boredom and indifference. Shigaraki fights against Re-Destro and his Quirk evolves. Shigaraki basically disintegrated the entire city and lov wins. The newer army later merged with the league to form the paranormal liberation front. It's a big ass criminal organization and Shigaraki's the absolute ruler of it all. Later the lieutenants are divided into squads and Dabi and Geten are put together which is hilarious and iconic. Shigaraki comes later to the doctor’s and is being put into a large lab tube for the next 4 months where he's developing a Quirk- afo. After these 4 months there's going to be a war between heroes and villains.

#boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha #mha #spoilers #manga spoilers #season 5 #i'm tired so i'm going to sleep #bye #league of villains #lov

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qqueenofhades · 5 years ago

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(Plus this gives me visuals for whenever I get back to the All Souls trilogy and vampire Flynn, so.) Visuals you say? Get back to your All Souls Trilogy, you say? Yes please.

Ahaha. That remains the plan eventually, yes, though I still can't promise that it will be super soon. I have had, or do have, and this is just off the top of my head:

- Timeless Season 4 (now finished, hooray), which at 13 episodes and an average of 44 pages apiece is close to 600;

- An original novel now over 200k words because I can't write short things;

- An academic book in final revisions which requires hours of nitpicky proofreading and now the thrilling work of compiling an index by hand;

- Multiple time-consuming job and fellowship applications that require statements and cover letters and other supporting content to be written for each, because academia is just fun like that;

- A part time job at a bookstore and other work commitments;

... which is not to bore you with the recitation of my dumb life, but to note that my fic muse has been in hibernation recently, and my workload remains pretty insane, so hang in there for a while yet. We will get back to TBDD eventually. Who knows, Vampire Goran might provide excellent science inspiration. Ahem.

#anonymous #ask

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sparda3g · 6 years ago

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My Hero Academia Chapter 224 Review

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Well…that sure escalated quickly. You would think after the declaration of war, there will be more build-up to the two factions. Instead, the great battle begins without any break. I guess Kohei is taking a page from Black Clover with its pacing. Oddly enough, a slow pace would have benefited this arc, but maybe it’s early to call. In any case, this was a decent chapter to start the great war of villains.

So to recap, according to Compress, the League of Villains are tracked by a satellite, Giran is taken hostage, and Gigantomachia has yet to join them. Everyone got that? Twice is the only guy that wants to save Giran, even if there’s a chance that he may be dead already. Insert Hokuten meme here. I got to credit Twice though for actually caring and want to pay back his deed. It’s just that he’s too emotional attached to the guy that he’s antagonizing the League. The best way to shut him up is take his mask; thanks for the tip, Shigaraki.

This would have been a great time to use all High-Ends they have in stock. Unfortunately, because of Pro Hero Arc, they are not ready to go in combat. If Dabi did retrieve that particular High-End from that said arc, they could have been ready to battle. Not to mention, they don’t have Gigantomachia on their side. Essentially, this makes the League the underdog of the two villainous factions. Oh no? Shigaraki has decided to go and accept the war.

So how they would handle over 110,000 enemies? Use the big guy, of course. He won’t wake up for another 2 hours and thirty-five minutes, but that will give some time to go to meet with the Army. Once they’re there and the hibernation period is over, the Army will have to deal with the big guy. Plus, it will slow him down as well, so it’s a win-win if done right. As Shigaraki puts it, no one is invincible; just stupidly high HP. Part of me think Kohei sees gamers as evil.

The League is close to Deika City, watching their battlefield before it goes to hell. At that point, only one hour and forty minutes left before the big guy wakes up. It’s served as a game-changer. I thought I wouldn’t see this hero again, but Slidin’ Go reappears here to help them to speak with the Liberation Army leader. So yeah, he’s part of the Army; he appeared before to make sure the devices blow up. At least he wasn’t throwaway, but you can argue he could have hold on longer to be revealed as one of the baddies. Anyway, he brings them to a trap.

The two top men, Chitose and Koku, are there to surprise their “guests” to Deika City or Liberation District. They’re in time for the second coming festival; for the Liberation Army. You know, it would be intense if it were the hero team that’s getting this ambush. When I hear “villain” and know they do villainy act, why would I feel alarmed by it? It is like, “Hey, whoever wins, we win!” First demons, now this. Perhaps if it was a group that was portrayed as morally grey, I would have worried for their lives.

I guess it was for the best to springboard to action because we are following evil, but it worries me that this is the third act. The location to Giran and Redestro is said, the plan to use Gigantomachia is set, and everyone in the League, including Dabi, is in the battle for their lives. Unless something changes later on, this feels like a missed opportunity. This is my early assumption and I can be wrong; I want to be wrong. My problem based on experience wise. Once the battle happens, it will be the last. Look at High-End or even Gentle; first time, first lost.

The League has entered the mini-boss stage as Shigaraki puts it. He is killing those henchmen with breeze. I forgot his quirk decays anything, so hooray for toned-down violence. That way, we won’t have complaints about bloody violence. Just tell kids that they are sent to the next dimension. Toga gets caught in a random explosion and it was set up by Chitose, preparing for the last interview. I don’t know why, but I can’t help but feel bewildered that Toga is going to have a serious battle first than Ochako, the main heroine. She is the main heroine, right?

Overall, it was a decent chapter, but wow, we sure kick start to the main course already. Not only the war is on, but the mini-bosses are on stage as well, starring Chitose. The first half sets up the plan; the next sets off the clash. The art is solid though. The battle between the two female villains should be good, now that no one has strict policy like the hero, so any harm is possible. How long will this arc last? I don’t know, but hopefully enough. I’ll be incredibly damned if this last shorter than Joint Training Arc. That…will be something…

#my hero academia #boku no hero academia #chapter 224 #review #spoilers

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guylty · 6 years ago

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8 am has come and gone, and I have immediately put the entries through randompicker to tell you the result. The Being Green shrine goes to…

Congrats to Dotti – I think I still have your address, Dotti (that’s if it hasn’t changed since 2014 when you sent me the e-mail with your address…) . And many thanks for your comments to all other participants. The draw protocol can be found HERE.

And now, to make it worth while, I’ll ramble on a little bit. The following post was actually scheduled for Monday morning, titled “Fashion Victim”. But I scrapped it when I realised that RA himself had posted his own fashion show overnight. As a Guy Girl I am more than happy that RA has held on to those essential pieces of costume from one of his most impactful chaRActers… And I love that he is making silly selfie faces now. The most attractive pose is humour. Sexy!!! Look who’s back in Nottingham:

Anyway, I had planned this post as a “blast from the past” where I was going to look at a fashionable item of leg wear for the benefit of those fans who may not have been with us back in 2016… With RA posting his own “fashion backward”, my little fun post became obsolete. But for the record: I started thinking about 2016 because we were talking about that in-te-res-ting leather shirt in the comments, and also about that crazy-ugly shiny track suit that poor Harry had to wear in VoD. Turns out the leather shirt has been around since 2016! (Thanks to Rachel for that revelation!!!) Which in turn led me to other recent instances of… erm… let’s call it “in-te-res-ting” again… choice of garments… While we have never seen the famous ‘orange jeans’ in action, Richard actually treated us to some maroon goodness instead:

https://twitter.com/DaphneHS/status/787399776019046400

https://twitter.com/DaphneHS/status/787401488142393346

*coughs*, interesting, right?

Hey, I am not criticising. I am not even making fun of him. I am the first one to put up her hand when it comes to owning up to a bad fashion sense… I totally am not in the know. Which is why I used to wear black only for many years. Sound familiar? *smirks* But yeah, what’s your take on that look? Like it or leave it?

Hooray, today is the first of spring. I think I am finally waking up from hibernation. In the last few days I have experienced this irrepressible urge to be creative. I did not only make the annual Paddy’s Day shrine, but while I was at it also made a long over-due shrine for one of my longtime supporters. (The shrine is ready and done but will only be revealed once my mystery supporter has received the shrine, sorry.) Anyway, making shrines always means that I have to dig through my materials – and invariably I come across bits and pieces that I have forgotten but that are delightful and therefore really inspire me to do some more creative work. As happened this time. An amazing vintage tin crossed my path, and I didn’t rest until the idea had been executed. And while I was at it, I also made another. And another. And another. And another. And another. And the next day I continued and made another, another, another and another. Six shrines in one day – ten shrines in total over the weekend. On Monday evening I called an “art evening” and the hubster, the daughter and I brought our art materials down to our big kitchen table and spent a really enjoyable evening creating art together. Daughter and husband are the *real* artists in the family. Not only can they draw and paint, but they also have original ideas. I, OTOH, am just an impostor. But I still enjoy being creative, and so I experimented with watercolours again.

Anyway, those shrines are all done and photographed, and some of them will be sent away as presents, and some will be raffled, so watch this space… And now go forth and enjoy the spring. Or autumn, if you are in the Southern hemisphere.

Raffle Result and Some Rambling 8 am has come and gone, and I have immediately put the entries through randompicker to tell you the result.

#Pocket Shrine #RAPS #Richard Armitage

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deepdeepjoyandpain · 6 years ago

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Happy 2019 friends

Writing this from under my covers, with a grateful heart. After our week of hibernation and projecting we joined the world again yesterday and it’s just been really fun.

Work email was so calm, work visits were great, and separation from my daughter for the first time in over a week felt fine, and also not needed in the way I thought it might be.

I also had therapy (hooray!) and a lunch date with a friend.

I picked up Lou and we went to hang out with two old friends and their families. I am so thankful she can jump in and do what kids do and PLAY for the two hours there, with girls she has not seen in a year. Then we went to our original NY destination, third year at my besties with a lot of her family and some friends. A full house of kids and adults. Kids are old enough that they just disappear and play monopoly for hours. I remember those NYE as a kid (family parties) and I loved them. I love recreating that for her.

We did a Netflix countdown at 930 and the two of us headed home. Right where we are supposed to be.

Tomorrow is Mary poppins and hopefully some good year end journaling.

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randomwoohoo · 6 years ago

Link

Judy: Previously on Zoomorphia

Nick: Judy survived the bull Savage attack. Hooray!! Thank Mr. Big for his kind help~

Judy: Luckily, he is one of a few mammals who know the truth of Hybrid.

Nick: Not to mention he’s a mafia boss with more than enough personal medical supplies. That’s icing on the cake!

Judy: But that Bolt the silver wolf then showed up and played havoc. He wanted our MidniDrivers for some reasons.

Nick: What would happen next? Let’s find out in this chapter, chapter 16!

Judy: Actually, it’s chapter 17, Nick.

Nick: Wait? Did I miss one whole chapter?

Judy: No, it’s just that the last chapter was a flashback-

Nick: Or we have like a secret chapter that is too ‘spicy’ to be published publicly?

Judy: There’s no such thing!

Nick: Yet

Judy: Nick!!

Fanfiction.net

.-.. . - .----. ... / -.-. --- -. - .. -. ..- .

A penumbral lunar eclipse cast a light upon a snow covered front yard of a luxurious house in the icy Easternmost district.

“Judy… We should use my body to transform...” Nick suggested while he together with Judy as Hybrid Police form was at a disadvantage fighting against Bolt the silver wolf.

After she reminisced about the night she and her partner first transformed into the armored hybrid mammal, “No! It’s too risky.” she objected to the idea.

Although Hybrid’s form which required Nick’s body was undoubtedly powerful, capable of putting an end to four Savages even when they were inexperienced, it was likely that the duo would lose control and go berserk.

They cannot let anyone fall to the same fate as Professor Woolworth the ram, who was still in a coma after risking his life to detransform them at that night.

However, she was fully aware that they cannot gave in to Bolt either. If they did, the wolf would continued taking justice into his own paws. No one would stop him from going on a killing spree.

Not pressuring Judy to come up with a solution, Nick knew well that Judy was beating her brains out figuring out how to overcome their opponent. Nick himself was thinking hard too.

Both thought back to past fights in order to analyze them. They lost to Bolt even though Hybrid possessed greater strength than him due to the fact that they were unable to catch up with his extraordinary speed.

Judy looked back further, eventually recalling the first time they met the silver wolf. At that time, he came to rescue them from mid-sized macropodine Savages on the downtown elementary school’s courtyard after Hybrid Archer form’s monitor detected something…

The monitor detected… She reflected.

“I’ve got one idea but it’s a long shot.” She said.

Nick somehow could hear her thought loud and clear, thereby being able to guess what idea she had in mind. “Worth trying” He responded.

While the armored mammal in Police form, dropping the pistol in the left paw, was struggling to rise and hold the handle tightly, “Ain’t you giving up yet?” Bolt asked the united duo.

“Sorry… but I dunno when to quit” Judy twisted the handle forth twice. “FORM SHIFT-ARCHER”

MidniDriver and gaps of the suit of armor simultaneously emitted purple fog spreading over Hybrid and the nearby area on the front yard with snow. The thick mist, hiding the armored mammal, obscured Bolt’s view.

Suddenly, an arrow pierced the fog.

“Accel!” Bolt, accelerating his system, dodged the high-speed arrow, fired from lower angle, in the nick of time.

Immediately following that, “ACTIVATE” Bolt heard the robotic voice before the bio-armored mammal in green leather tunic, hood with red feather, and charcoal mark on face that resembles eye mask, Hybrid Archer form, dashed close to the wolf’s side with a bow in the left paw and a gladius sword in the right paw.

“Double accel!” Increasing his acceleration, the silver wolf moved away from the swung blade.

Bolt flashed around, which made the purple thick mist fade away, allowing Mr. Big the old shrew and his polar bear henchmen see the situation clearly again.

They found out that the silver wolf was briskly circling the armored mammal with doe figure and fox characteristics in the hooded tunic.

Afterwards, Hybrid stabbed the sword into the ground, then moved the right paw to grip the maroon handle of MidniDriver before twisting it. “CRITICAL BREAK”

Next, Hybrid, right palm glowing, drew the sword up. When the armored mammal got the paw on the sword’s grip, a glow was transferred to the blade.

The silver wolf later tried seizing the smaller flamingo red animal from behind. Hybrid whose monitor tracked motion of the mechanical mammal spun to swing the glowing sword at him.

He therefore went backwards like lightning to avoid the attack, then ran in curve to backside of the armored mammal.

After that, the monitor of Archer form started to calculate the wolf’s movement while Hybrid was drawing the bow.

Nick turned the armored mammal back before he discharged the glowing sword an arrow at the silver wolf.

It flew like the wind towards Bolt. “Oh scrap! Triple-” Unable to activate the greater acceleration in time, he got penetrated by the sharp blade in one of his thighs. As a result, he, losing his balance, fell on the ground.

Although this Archer form’s finishing move was not the strongest among all of forms’ finishers, it was indeed the fastest the duo had and fortunately, it was fast enough to win this fight.

“Looks like the tables have turned.” Nick said to Bolt as Hybrid’s weapons vanished into thin air, the sword stuck in his leg disappearing.

The armored mammal proceeded towards the lying down silver wolf who had few electric sparks coming out from a damage on his thigh.

“Bolt, if that’s really your name, you’re under arrest for multiple murders.” Judy stated in stern tone.

“Bolt!” Mittens bawled to him on their private wireless communication. “Your leg received too much damage! Retreat! Right now!”

“Are you sure that laws apply to machine?” He asked Judy in a humorous manner and then disappeared. The mammals in the area were surprised at first. Eventually, the united duo noticed a trail of footprints on the snow.

“He escaped huh?” Nick assumed that Bolt used his extraordinary speed to run away.

“That’d the case.” Judy replied.

The bow gradually disappearing, Hybrid shifted the left paw to pull the syringe in order to detransform. After the armor, discharging purple steam, was gone and Judy changed back to normal, Mr. Big’s henchmen rejoiced at the duo’s victory.

Subsequently, the doe rabbit fell over in the snow, so the polar bears stopped cheering. Some of them rushed to help her.

“Please let me take a little break.” She said tiredly before falling asleep.

Mr. Big the old shrew on the paw of his most trusted henchman sighed relievedly, then turned to the red fox who had just woken up in the bear’s arm. “Incidentally, Nicky, have you put on weight?” He became aware of the fox’s bloated tummy not long ago.

“Your house’s so icy I’d love to hibernate.” He joked wearily, pushing the syringe to inject the blood.

- .-. -.-- / - .. .-.. .-.. / .-- .. -.

The next day, Judy believed headstrongly that she should go to work. However, Clawhauser insisted that both she and Nick had better take another day off. He had got them covered. Besides, Mr. Big’s family was more than glad to have the doe and the tod as guests.

Luckily, there was no Savage terrorizing Zootopia city on that day. Judy accordingly had some proper rest while Nick could have free time to lose excess weight.

The day after,

“Y’know. I wouldn’t mind you being portly.” The doe was ambling across a parking lot.

“Admit it~ I’m irresistible~” The red fox in a neat navy blue police uniform, Senior officer Wilde, was prancing next to the grey European bunny, Senior officer Hopps, on their way to ZPD headquarters. He showed his slender waist off.

“Well, good thing we don’t have to get you a larger-sized uniform.” She responded.

When other officers perceived that both of them made an entrance into the station, they came to tease them. It seemed that Clawhauser reported that Senior officer Hopps was still sick, so Senior officer Wilde took another day off to look after his partner.

Later that day, Jasmine Fangmeyer the bengal tigress SCU agent, dressed in a green V-neck T-shirt with SCU logo, visited her old workplace, the station. She used the opportunity to catch up with some of her old co-workers, Judy, Nick and Jackson Rajah the bengal tiger officer, in a break room.

“By the way, thank you again, Jacky, for your help the other day.” Sitting at the head of the table with a smile on her face, Jasmine thanked Rajah, who took a seat at one side of a rectangle table near the corner.

“N-No problem.” He stammered, getting a little bit embarrassed. “A-And please don’t call me like that again. You haven’t called me ‘Jacky’ since-”

“Since middle school graduation! Time sure flies.” She nudged the turning-pink tiger officer.

“You look quite lively today, Fangmeyer. Did something good happen?” Nick, leaning against a backrest, sat on the same side with Judy opposite to Rajah.

“Nothing gets past you huh?” Jasmine rubbed her flushing neck while the male tiger was observing her body language.

She then started telling a story. “Do you remember the time I went undercover for the investigation and the total stranger saved me from some thugs?”

Nick and judy nodded their heads as a response.

Jasmine therefore continued. “Back then all I knew was that guy name is Al cuz those thugs called him like that but the point is… a few days ago, I chanced on him again and discovered that he’s a hustler.”

“I followed him to find that he gave stolen loaves of bread to poor kits and pups in a slum. That’s why I just gave him a warning and a pass.” She said further.

“Does he happen to be an arabian leopard?” Nick recollected the hustler whose nickname is Al.

“Yes! He is!” Jasmine confirmed.

“You know him?” Judy asked her partner.

“I know everyone~ His name is Allan Bubba.” Nick said the leopard hustler’s name to boastfully prove that he really knew him.

Subsequently, the bunny officer paid attention to the blushing tigress agent bowing her head as if... “Hang on! Do you have a crush on him!?” She unintentionally blurted a question out.

“Don’t judge me!!” Jasmine shouted out of embarrassment. “You even have feelings for an ex-con-artist fox!” She accidentally let what many of their co-workers believed slip.

“What are you talking about?” Judy seriously had no clue what Jasmine meant.

The tigress speedily covered her mouth with both paws, just remembering that the doe had not realized it yet, as the tod brought his right paw to his face.

“Let me guess. You wanna know this ‘Al’ guy better, right?” Nick peeped at Jasmine through gaps between his fingers of the paw covering his face.

“You saw through me, didn’t ya?” She smiled sheepishly.

“Based on you information, I suppose the leopard you’re referring to must be Bubba but I need to at least see a picture of him to be sure.” He moved both paws to over his head.

Rajah, who sat at the table with Jasmine and the duo from the beginning, smiled with sorrow-filled eyes. “I’ve just recalled that I have to do some checking on the missing mammal cases. Later mates.” He made an excuse to leave the room.

“Wait for me!” Judy hopped off the chair and followed Rajah out of the break room.

Once her doe rabbit friend was not there, the tigress used the opportunity to change the subject. “Wilde, be honest with me. Are you really okay with this?”

“What do you mean?” Although Nick vaguely knew what Jasmine was talking about, he would rather beat around the bush.

“I mean this whole Jude not aware of feelings for you thing...” She clarified.

“You two get along so well! And think about how kindly she treats you! Truth be told, despite appearing generous, most of us, including me, were skeptical of you at first. Your partner was the one who convinced us that you are trustworthy.”

“even though I’m a fox.”

Jasmine was taken aback by Nick’s words because he really hit the nail on the head.

“But hey, we live in the world where a bunny can be such an amazing cop. Anything’s possible at this point~” He cracked a joke to light up the mood.

“Yeah…” She laughed awkwardly before she composed herself. “The issue here is… don’t you like like Jude?”

“I... do”

“Are there any downsides of being with her or are you not into interspecies relationship?”

“No”

“Or actually, you’re not into females?”

“That’s not the case.”

“So what’s holding you back from going out with her!? What if somebody decides to ask her out before you do??”

“I think that’ll be all for the best.”

The tigress got shocked by the tod’s reply. After a few moments pause, he explained. “Assuming that we’re in a relationship, I will eventually bring her down… No doubt.”

Nick put on a smile, an empty smile, while Jasmine fell silent, not knowing what to say.

-.-. --- -. ..-. .-.. .. -.-. - .. -. --. / ..-. . . .-.. .. -. --. …

Following that the bengal tiger and the grey rabbit left the break room, she led him to a rooftop of the station to have a private conversation with him.

“I’m gonna be frank with you. You’re in love with Jasmine, aren’t you?” Judy initiated a heart-to-heart talk.

“How did you know?” The surprised tiger responded to a question with another question.

“It’s obvious. Anyway, why don’t you make any moves?”

“Well, Fangmeyer is my friend and I’m indebted to her… I don’t wanna ruin our friendship.”

Despite her curiosity, Judy did not want to go in-depth into the story behind Rajah being in Jasmine’s debt. Consequently, she chose to stick to the main subject.

“You should at the very least tell her how you feel. No need to be flashy, just tell her.”

“But she’s already have a crush-”

“Even so, do you intend to hide your true feelings forever? You know how Jasmine is as a mammal. If it turns out she doesn’t feel the same way after you confess your love to her, she wouldn’t cut you off, right? Keeping bottling up your feelings may lead you to regret it later.”

“Thank you, Hopps. I’ll keep that in mind.” Rajah genuinely appreciated Judy’s benevolent advice; hence, he would like to return the favor. “Anyhow, when are you going to get together with Wilde? Or are you waiting for him to take action first?”

“What!?” Judy exclaimed. “Nick and I are just friends! What makes you jump to that conclusion!?”

“To be honest, it’s quite obvious. You spend an awful lot of time with each other both on and off shift. There’s serious chemistry between you two.” He replied.

“Because Nick and I are such good friends and partners, plus the chemistry thing is just we get along well, that’s all.” She explained earnestly.

“You even do things together at his place.”

“That...” Judy tried to think up an argument.

“Second evidence, you both are beyond close. Third evidence, you clearly care for each other so much. Fourth evidence, you can comfortably be next to one another in silence. Fifth evidence-”

“OK! OK! You proved your point...” She stopped him listing proofs.

Nevertheless, what Rajah the bengal tiger said got her thinking. Come to think of it, I really don’t spend much free time with other male mammals except Nick. We crash with each other every now and then. What’s more, I don’t mind getting physically close to him…

I enjoy Nick’s company… I wanna be with him… Wait… Why do all of these sound like a relationship? That was the moment Judy realized her feelings for her partner, her friend. “Oh my tod, am I in relationship with Nick without knowing it?”

The realization hit her hard.

“You said ‘my tod’ as an exclamation or a claim for ownership?” Rajah wondered.

“Both” She accidentally answered without thinking before realizing what she had just said. “I mean the latter. I mean as a claim! I mean! As the exclaimation!” She had a rough time regaining her composure, wishing for something or someone to take her out of this awkward situation.

Shortly afterwards, her wish came true. Rajah got a call from Jasmine that there was a report on Savages’ attack in the north-west of Downtown. She accordingly phoned him to let him know that she had to leave the station.

Judy considered contacting Nick in order to go together to deal with the Savages as Hybrid but the only problem was that just thinking about him made her heart skip a beat.

.-.. --- ...- . / ..- -. -.. . .-. / .- - - .- -.-. -.-

After Jasmine left to do her job, Nick pondered whether he should tell Judy about Savages’ attack or not. When he thought back to the previous encounter with the bull Savage, he believed that I would be better to keep her out of this. His phone then rang once, interrupting his , so he brought it out to check the notifications.

“I should see this coming.” He saw a text from Judy. She told him that they would head down to the scene as soon as possible.

When they met up the lobby, “Take me with you guys” Clawhauser showed up.

Judy got concerned. “But this is-”

“Dangerous, I know. In case anything happened, I’ll be there to protect Nick’s unconscious body.” He convinced the duo.

They consequently let the chubby cheetah officer accompany them to the north-western part of Savanna Central.

Meanwhile, SCU agents were handling problems associated with three Savages, a purple caprid, a purple maned lion and a purple wolverine. They would not dare shoot guns in a crowded public place. The risk of civilians getting shot by accident was too high. Accordingly, their priority at that time was to evacuate civilians in the area in the shortest possible time.

“Report the status of an evacuation!” Maximus the white stallion, the SCU team leader, yelled.

However, the horse was confused by the fact that these monsters only either did minor physical harms to mammals or snarled at them. He wondered why they did not charge at the mammals.

Once Nick, Judy and Clawhauser finally reached the scene, the Savages made a move, going towards a commercial area. Hence, the mammals in the area moved away scaredly to let the monsters get through.

A panther, one of the agents, made an attempt to shoot the purple beasts. Unfortunately, they dodged the shots, so the bullets hit a tall lamp post, which greatly startled several civilians.

“Stop freaking firing!” Maximus ordered angrily.

The duo and Clawhauser hurriedly went by an indirect route to catch up with the running monsters.

Judy put MidniDriver, the black morpher, on her waist while rushing through a deserted alleyway. Close behind her, Nick looked at his morpher in his paw hesitantly before wearing it and “DRAW BLOOD” transferring a dose of his blood to the other device.

After “INJECT” She injected his blood into herself, the panting cheetah caught the fainting fox, preventing him from falling to the ground.

Next, she twisted the handle once “IGNITE” to transform. Following the purple mist explosion, the flamingo red armored mammal mixed between a rabbit and a fox, Hybrid Hustler form, charged out of the boiling hot fog.

When the united duo turned around the corner, “It looks like our target took the bait.” they heard a male fruity voice coming from the silver chrome wolf with a black bar over his eyes, solar panels on both chest and shoulders, and two thunderbolt stripes on abdomen.

He was standing relaxedly, surrounded by three Savages in a wide blind alley.

“Good as new” Bolt the silver wolf showed his repaired thigh to the united duo.

Despite the past conflicts between the wolf and them, the duo especially Judy could not sit by and let him be attacked by the monsters. The united duo therefore launched Hybrid with a purpose of saving him.

Without warning, Bolt leapt forward, then threw a left hook at Hybrid. The united duo did not expect the punch, so they almost did not block Bolt’s left glowing fist with the right arm in time.

Consequently, Hybrid flew quickly to the side and landed on the ground with the shaking right arm. It seemed the wolf added some electricity to his attack, messing nerves in the right arm.

“What’s going on here!? What’s with those Savages!?” Judy got dazed.

“I don’t wanna brag but...” Bolt bopped his left palm repeatedly. “Are you impressed in my friend’s works. Mam, she hacked into their control systems and now, they follow every single order- Ow! Keep your voice down pretty please...” He covered his ears although it did not help since Mittens shouted through wireless communication system that is directly connected to him. She told him to focus on the task.

The duo did not notice at the first glance because most mammals could barely recognize the purple creatures but this purple maned lion reminded them of the time they helped Bolt to stop the purple lion before he did something to it.

Control? Nick and Judy doubted.

“Let’s cut to the chase. Give me your drivers or else...” He threatened them.

Both thought that if they did beat him once, they could pull it off again; thus, they moved the left paw to hold the handle, intending to change into Archer form.

Suddenly, the purple caprid crashed into Hybrid, making the armored mammal fall.

“Go get ‘em, boys.” Bolt said.

Right after his simple order, the lion Savage and the wolverine Savage charged at the armored mammal.

The united duo got up hastily. Thanks to rapid healing, Hybrid was able to use both arms to deal with the Savages.

Meanwhile, Bolt merely stood there, observing the fight, as Clawhauser, holding the unconscious fox body in his arms, peeked around the corner.

When the monsters encircled Hybrid, the armored mammal pushed the silver syringe “ACTIVATE” to activate the instantaneous movement ability. The purple beasts collided with each other as Hybrid teleported to a spot that was a few steps far from them.

At that moment, “Accel!!” Bolt, aware of Hybrid’s weakness about becoming vulnerable after teleportation, rushed to kick the armored mammal in the stomach.

The kick sent the united duo flying backward before they in one body hit the ground hard. Once the accelerated mechanical wolf approached the armored mammal lying on the ground in a mere second, he pulled the syringe of MidniDriver on Hybrid, forcing the partners as one to detransform.

The attack took its toll on the doe rabbit. Soon following that Judy turned back to normal, she was knocked out by pain.

“One down, one to go.” Bolt knew that Nick along with Clawhauser was not far away because Mittens told him when she saw them on a hacked CCTV camera. He was about to go after the other morpher.

As a result, “This is bad! This is bad! This is bad!” Clawhauser hastily fled with Nick, who was regaining his consciousness, in his arms.

Nick wanted to tell Clawhauser to leave him and run away. Unfortunately, he was suffering fatigue too much to communicate at that time, so he pushed the syringe to inject the dose of blood into himself in order to cure his extreme tiredness.

Bolt pursued the officers to crooked alleyways, thinking that it would be a piece of cake; thus, he had already deactivated his acceleration. However, by the time he found the panting cheetah officer staying put, the fox officer, Bolt’s another main target, was nowhere to be found. Even Mittens lost him.

“Where is Officer Wilde?” Bolt asked Clawhauser in a friendly tone.

Clawhauser shrugged his shoulders in a response, pretending to be fearless in front of the silver chrome wolf.

“Alright, for the heads up, I don’t have anything against you.” Bolt jumped over Clawhauser and tapped the back of the cheetah’s neck, sending electricity to knock him off.

“Okay~ Officer Wilde, I know you can hear me~” Bolt spoked louder.

As a matter of fact, Nick certainly heard him. He was hiding not far from Bolt but in a spot that cannot be seen by CCTVs. Owing to his past experiences as a con-artist, he knew the blind spots around Zootopia.

So he can observe through CCTVs… or he has an accomplice assisting him… Nick analysed.

“I’m taking your cheetah pal and Ms. Hopps as hostages. If you want me to free them, bring your driver to me at a warehouse row in Rainforest District and don’t be tricky~” The silver wolf picked the senseless chubby cheetah up easily to some extent.

“You have 48 hours- No, that’s too much. How about 24? Rhino, what do you think?” He quieted down for some seconds like he waited for someone to reply. “8 It is. You have 8 hours, Officer Wilde~ See ya~”

Bolt went back to pick Judy up too, then disappeared from the blind alley with his controlled Savages, leaving Nick leaning against the wall alone while pondering.

He took her away… The fox clenched a fist as his emotions rose, so did his… returning abnormal hunger.

- --- / -... . / -.-. --- -. - .. -. ..- . -..

#zootopia #zootopia fanfiction #zootopia tokusatsu au #zoomorphia

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kateywumpus · 7 years ago

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State of the Wumpus

Current State: Accomplished

So I’ve been noticing a pattern. Something will trigger my depression. It really doesn’t matter what, to be honest. I haven’t noticed a pattern in that yet, but in what happens after this trigger. Now, keep in mind that a lot of things trigger my depression and anxiety these days but in these cases whatever it is sends me careening into a downward spiral so hard and so fast that literally all I can do is spend the entire next day wallowing in my own misery while in bed and sleeping. I only get up to pee, and drink some water because it’s the only self-care thing I can bring myself to do, after all all that crying leaves you awfully dehydrated. Then, at the end of the night, after I’m exhausted from keeping myself from going over the brink and actually following through whatever fool plan my brain wants me to do, things reverse and I start thinking positively and creatively again.

Example:

Saturday I visited my parents. It was the first time since my stay at Unity Behavioral Health center (A good place to go, Portland folks, if you need help) and I confessed that I may not be able to actually hold a job and that I’m trying to see if I can’t get some housing assistance and on disability. This upset my father, as I knew it would. Not in the “he’s angry at me” kind of way but the “my daughter is hurting in a way I have no experience with and I’m not able to fix and goddammit I thought I was smart enough to fix everything” kind of way. He said some things like he usually does, and the stress of not trying to overreact to everything he said just kind of triggered my anxiety and set me to uncontrollably crying, as it is wont to do. No, the thing that triggered yesterday’s episode was that when I went to hug him, he stiffened up and didn’t really hug back.

That hurt. That hurt a LOT. Even though he and I don’t really get along (not in the we’re antagonistic towards each other kind of way, but in the we live on different planes of existence and just don’t understand each other kind of way) we do care for each other, and I haven’t had him do that before when we hug. Like I said. It hurt. Later that night my brain just took that as the queue to take the ball and just run with it right past the end field and out onto the dirt road like so much Forrest Gump running blindly into the night.

I spent the night crying and giving up on life. Killed my social media accounts (which made a lot of you worry, I know. I’m sorry) and literally spent the entire time in bed crying my eyes out and sleeping. I made Plans which were ludicrous if you examined them with any iota of rationality (not that I was rational at the time), but I came nowhere near acting any of them out, though I did take a double dose of NyQuil to knock my ass out when the worst of it started. (It worked)

Until last night at about 2 in the morning when everything just kind of cleared up, and I started getting brilliant ideas. Such as, one of the problems that I had last week was finding a decent enough Primary Care Physician that can handle my transition needs, my mental health needs, my diabetic needs, as well as help me get on disability so I don’t feel like I’m wasting the good will of my landlord because I’m having problems coming up with rent. The solution came to me: I remembered a while back, an article about OHSU started a transgender outreach program that’s dedicated to providing quality service to us and, since they’re a teaching hospital, get good doctors with trans experience under their belt out and into the world. Something we desperately need more of. They’ll also have a better idea of who I can go to for counseling. I’ve got something lined up, and I’ve worked with them before, and they’re okay, but I’d rather have somebody a little more focused, but they’re okay for now.

So come today, I’ve got the PCP thing sorted out. Hooray! Accomplishment! It also highlighted exactly why I can’t work. Any amount of stress just triggers my anxiety to horrible levels. During intake where they were getting my details, it turns out I was in the system and they needed to know my old name. Just... the stress of having somebody know me by my old name was enough to send me to tears and that isn’t something that usually bothers me. Or at least it didn’t use to.

But the cycle I’m talking about, the pattern that I’ve noticed is this Trigger -> Suicidal Depression -> Hibernation -> Positive Action. This is the second time this happened to me, and I have nooooooooooo idea what it means, or how to prevent it, or even if I can. At least something good comes out from these cycles at least.

#State of the wumpus #transgender #Suicide #Suicidal ideation #still here #not dead yet #personal

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bellanowebstudio · 6 years ago

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besitospjm · 8 years ago

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Get to know me tag 💕

tagged by the cutie @beeguk

tagging: @savage-yoongi-gives-me-life(double tag because #soulpartners) @blood-sweat-and-sin(because i love you&hobi) @bjork-23(because we’re basically sisters) @jhs1994(because hooray for successful, educated noonas) @saintminyoongi(because you’re the homie) @socuteyoongi(even tho rehearsals got you busy) @cum-for-hoseok(because you and I will fight for hobi’s rights) @w00nkiee(because you’re my first tumblr friend&i miss you) @hobiismycupoftea(because you appreciate Jin and because you were one of my first friends on here!) @minyoongiismyinspiration(because Nat you’re so soft, i love you) @sugamysavagebaby(because you’re a bangtan noona like me and i need to meet more of our kind) @lolalovezyou(because you’re my ACTUAL sister and deserve a shoutout!)

answer the questions and tag some people you’d like to get to know better ♡

01. nickname

Dewey, Delilah, Moe, Cheese, Bubba Joan, Luna, Wayne, Chowder, Naruto, Fingerling, Emolilah, Andy, Emma, Ylva, Nigel, Norah Jane Watson, and Melissa(I have at least one person that calls me by each of these names. I swear)

02. gender

female

03. starsign

Two-Face(aka Gemini)

04. height

Short af. 5′4″

05. time right now

8:42pm

06. last thing i googled

How to spell Petechia because i freaking forgot and had to document that at work. lol

07. favourite bands

BTS!!!!! Pierce the Veil, A Day to Remember, All Time Low, Emarosa, Arctic Monkeys, My Chemical Romance, Sum 41, We The Kings, Bring Me The Horizon, Alesana, Panic! At The Disco(even though its only Brendon now), Circa Survive, The Kooks, Isles and Glaciers, DANCEGAVINDANCE, Escape The Fate, AFI, and the list goes on…

08. favourite solo artists

Bon Iver, Birdy, SHAWN MENDES, Jay Park, The Weeknd, Drake, City and Colour(because Dallas Green is a freaking babe), Hozier, Amy Winehouse(RIP), Keak Da Sneak, Too $hort, Miguel(no, not my brother), Aaron Yan, KID CUDI, The Ready Set, Never Shout Never, Norah Jones, Enya, CAMILA CABELLO, etc…

09. song stuck in your head right now

It G Ma - Keith Ape, Jayallday, Loota, Okasian, Kohh (This song is a banger, I feel hood af when I listen to it.)

10. last movie you watched

I forgot what it’s called but it has Melissa McCarthy. Where she hits rock bottom and literally robs a fried chicken place lol

11. last tv show you watched

Modern Family or How I Met Your Mother. I can’t remember which one I watched last.

12. when did you create your blog

Humingyayyy was previously Parathormone which was previously Humingyayy(with 2 Ys) lol which was previously KingNorahofSarcasm which was created April of 2011. but don’t quote me on that.

13. what do you post

Now i stick to BTS and relatable memes/text posts. Previously, i would post anything because my blog is trash like myself. ALSO KLAROLINE.

14. when did your blog reach its peak

that text post about yoongi stans loving hobi!! 1,036 and still going strong lol jk

15. do you have any other blogs

i have @hyungwonthememe which is dedicated to Monster x which I have neglected thanks to BTS(not that i’m mad or anything, I love you, Yoongi) @kingkyungs00 which is dedicated to my first love.(also, neglected and brenda and Shannon know this lol)

16. do you get asks regularly

technically not asks because it’s the homies reaching out to me lol

17. why you chose your url

So, I was into Japanese things way before becoming a heaux for South Korean culture. so, in consequence, I loved Hana Yori Dango!! In one scene Domyouji’s sister quotes Ernest Hemingway about fighting for love. So Domyouji goes to Makino and like repeats the verse and he’s like “baka, don’t you know Humingyay???” and I deadass laughed so hard as someone who loves literature. but yeah, thats it. lol

18. following

306 - but i was following like 500 before and I swear I felt so bad getting rid of some but like we weren’t even mutuals so??? I shouldn’t feel bad. lol

19. posts

LMAO I NEVER THOUGHT OF THIS BEFORE THIS POST BUT ACCORDING TO THE INTERNET: 20,981.

20. hogwarts house

slytherin. i even have my house pin!!

21. pokemon team

I honestly never did level up enough to actually get a team. sorry.

22. favourite colours

blue, yellow, green. BUT FOR MY CLOTHING BLACK.

23. average hours of sleep

anywhere between 4 and 33. because sometimes i hibernate.

24. lucky numbers

3 or 13. since i was born because 93 liner!(yaasss yoongi)

25. favourite characters

ugh, how dare you? I love all the villains tbh. Young Tom Marvolo was freaking bae. Niklaus Mikaelson(TVD), Marshall(how i met your mother), Phil Dunfy(Modern Family), Chuck Bass(gossip girl), Domyouji Tsukasa(Hana Yori Dango), King Louie(shopping king louie), okay so I either love the softies or the evil ones. lol

26. what are you wearing right now

yoongi’s pumas, gray skirt, and blue button up. (real classy) *sarcasm*

27. how many blankets do you sleep with usually

1 because Satan hates me and i get cold at night but like?? kick the covers off at night and then I am cold again. #bless david for always covering me up at like 3 am.

28. dream job

RN in Neonatal/Pediatrics.

29. dream trip

BISH YOU KNOW MY ASS WOULD FLY TO KOREA SO QUICK IF I HAD THIS CASH MONEY. but alas, I am poor (save me).

So, thats all folks. i’m quite boring but also if you want to hear some of my stories just ask @savage-yoongi-gives-me-life I am full of them. lol love y'all!!(:

#about me #y'all don't have to do this #i just really want to know you all #cause you guys are amazing #love me back please #tag

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